I decided to write about my story, how terrible I was. Of course, hoping to remain anonymous for everyone, I want to put all my thoughts to rest. In 2008, at that time, the girl in the 3rd grade imagined my future like a fairy tale. Everything was in front of me. I was at a bright age when I could have changed my future in any way. I liked the school where I was not allowed to drop out because I studied on a survivor’s allowance.
I met him one evening. At the end of autumn with such a nasty cold wind, when I went to my practice place and was leaving, I saw a young man. When I first saw him in a white outfit and his hair was very strange, I could not think whether he was a singer or an actor, but when I was about to move on, he asked me if I should hold a taxi with him to go in the same direction.
At that time, I was renting a public house in far away from the city. So, sat together in the same car, and my failure came knocking at the door. He got my number when I got off and we started texting. At first, I believed that he was studying at a trade industry institute, but it soon turned out to be a lie. He told me that he was a DJ at a bar. Sometimes I would cook and go to his work and give food for him then come back.
When my boyfriend works at night, I can’t see him during the day, so he always sneaks to see me at work at night or he comes to my place after work. I used to go to class sleepy and tired. I will go to school thinking that I will graduate soon. When I say to him quit his job, then he says it is his hobby.
He has a lot of money every day. He also takes care of me well. I try to imagine my future because this is how young couples start. My mother lives with my younger brother in the countryside and I tried for a year to bring him to my home, but I couldn’t. The time has not yet come, he said.
I got pregnant in the winter of the 4th semester. I was very happy thinking that my child had arrived just in time. We were still living in our shared apartment, but I told my mom that I had a boyfriend, but I didn’t show it. At that time, he had managed to change his work at three bars. Even though he worked in a bar, he didn’t drink alcohol, which was a reason I could trust.
But when I was with him for 1 year and 6 and 7 months, I have never introduced his parents. He always said that my parents are people with old-fashioned views, let’s meet them later. I become 2 months old pregnant. I want to sort it out today because he never said that he would take the child out.
Moreover, I graduated too. When I got angry and said that I want to tell my mother too, he reassured me that he would tell his parents the next month. Before I could wait for the next month, my bright love faded away. I did not know who the person I love next to me was, carrying the child in my belly. What was the worst thing? He had a wife and children. Even an officially approved family.
After his wife gave birth to his child, she took her son to Korea to go back to school. His wife suddenly came. When he was sleeping, a text message came saying that his wife went to her parents and his child is crying, when he woke up and call. He goes to work at night, comes back to sleep, and there were no quarrels over alcohol, so I did not check his phone. There is no one as stupid as me. I woke him up and cried, complained, and told him that it was to be a lie, then I got hurt until I got to the point.
“A guy like me is not suitable for you,” he said and took the clothes away and went. I just become to be the miserable girl that a guy with a family, played with me when he was alone. I called and texted him a lot, but then he changed the number and disappeared. I did not even go to my graduation party, and I stayed late without going on a picnic with my classmates. I did not even go to get my diploma, later I got it from the educational office. His work colleagues knew about that.
When I went to the bar with food, they were greeted as the wife of our T… how can people be so mean I thought. I went to my home when I was 5 months old pregnant. I told my mother the truth. Well, my mother welcomed me as a celebration, saying that having children will not be that hard. Any news, also messages from him. I knew his mother’s number, but I did not dare to tell her the truth. Therefore I gave birth to my son at the maternity hospital in my province.
After giving birth to my son, I dared to call his mother for the first time saying that I was his friend, and took his number. Thinking that he would not answer if I called, I left a message to find him out how many kilograms and centimeters his son was born. There was no reply. But after this later, he called me at night. I am sorry, I want to see my son, I am divorced from my wife. She knew us and then left. If you give me a chance, come to me and let’s, both think about our son, my head started spinning again.
I started to think after living like this, he told his family about me and took his son with him to Ulaanbaatar city, wondering if we could become a family and if my son could sleep in his father’s arms. Also, before coming to town, he calls and says that if I have money, he said to send it first to him. Because of us his home always gets quarrels and he wants to stay in a hotel before we arrive. Therefore, I gave him some money and came to town with my son. My mother told me that bring that man here, but I said to her I will come back with the three of us and sat on the train.
Came to town and he picked us up, and we went to his hotel room. I told him “Well, shall we go to your place?” but he said we will stay here for the night and go tomorrow. When he saw our son, he said that it was me, and that evening was full of laughter that I will never forget, like a happy family. He was just like a father. Other than staying at the hotel, I was really happy. I woke up in the morning and found that he was gone. He left me a message that he lied, he said that he divorced to see my son only once.
My wife and son are still together, so do not call my mother again because our family does not know. I wish both of you happiness he said. Think about it, a stupid woman with a baby left the hotel. I almost felt crazy and wanted to kill myself. I thought I would kill myself. I would leave my child’s entrance to a building near the movie theater and decide to stand on the road and get under the wheels of the car. I put my son on the second floor and when I turned around one woman yelled at me “A bastard” she was cleaning that building. I did not know what I said, but she cursed at me and hit me.
She took my son in her arms, also kicked me, and wanted to stay in her duty station. When she told me to tell the police, I just came to my senses and started begging that sister I would go with my son. She told me to stay the night, so I stayed with that sister on duty with her two daughters. That night, I spent the night listening to the truest lecture that I have ever heard. I went back home the next day. I never took my son away from me again. Today, I have a good job and colleagues, a good home, and my biggest support is my son. We live happily as like friends. I am lucky that have my son beside me, also he fries eggs for me and takes care of me.
My son grew up to be a very bright and smart boy, he always says that he would sell houses like me. But that person who has no human rights, the man who hurt me until I stopped trusting man, he was still working at a bar club. He said he is still with his wife and children. But 10 years ago, he was there, and now still there. Well, they said that his occupation has been raised a little. I am afraid of what he would be doing now if he had not left me. I would never be punished for wasting my youth around him. My youth only cried for a few months. That sister, who is angry at the entrance, must be living a peaceful and happy life and I am so happy that her words were so meaningful to me.